Home Psychology Why Do People Hate Me So Much

Why Do People Hate Me So Much

by Lyndon Langley
Why Do People Hate Me So Much

Why Do People Hate Me So Much

I often get asked the question “why do people hate me so much?” And I am sure that it has crossed your mind at some point too. The reason for this is simple – if someone hates you then there must be something about you that they find objectionable and therefore dislike. This could relate to anything from how well you treat others, what kind of car you drive, the clothes you wear, where you live, who your friends are, what religion you belong to and on and on. Of course, not every one will hate you but most people’s anger towards you may be based upon an incident that took place in their life.
The first thing we need to consider when looking at why people hate us is whether these things really matter? Just because someone dislikes something about you does not mean that they would actually go out of their way to try and harm you over them. However, even though most people don’t physically harm another person, it doesn’t mean that they won’t try to make your life difficult by any means necessary. It all depends on the individual and how they see you. If you are perceived as a threat to their self image, or trying to take away their power base, then you can expect to experience a lot of hostility. They might try to sabotage your career, break up with your partner, refuse to help you out or just generally cause problems for you.
If you were to ask them directly, they may say that they feel threatened by you, but deep down they know that it isn’t your fault. There is also the possibility that they think you’re better than them and they resent having to work harder than you. Another possibility is that they are simply angry with you due to past experiences which caused them pain and they are now using you as a target to get back at you. Whatever the reasons for their hatred towards you, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they will succeed in harming you. But it certainly increases the chances of it happening.
So, what should you do about it? Well, the best advice here is to look within yourself at what causes you to become upset over time. Are you quick to react to small slights or insults? Do you always assume the worst in other people or jump to conclusions about their actions without giving them the benefit of the doubt? Is it easier for you to blame other people rather than taking responsibility for your own behaviour? These are all signs that you need to examine more closely. You probably already know how you behave around certain people and situations, but unless you acknowledge it and put measures in place to stop it, it is likely to continue.
As human beings we naturally tend to project our thoughts and feelings onto others. We expect them to respond to us in a certain way, especially when we feel vulnerable. We are very good at seeing patterns and making judgements about people. We see what we are used to and we draw conclusions based on those observations. Sometimes we are right and sometimes wrong. In reality, it is unlikely that anyone wants to hurt us because of what we believe about ourselves. What makes us think that we are being targeted is usually our ego telling us that things aren’t going our way. However, if we allow our egos to run wild and start believing everything they tell us, then we are no longer able to objectively assess people or events. This is not healthy and ultimately leads to unnecessary stress and anxiety.
In order to combat this tendency, we need to remind ourselves that everyone has faults and failings like everyone else. Our job is to accept that and move forward, knowing that we can only change ourselves and not other people. When we understand that we cannot control other peoples’ reactions to us, we can relax and begin to focus on finding solutions to improve our own lives. Once we realise that we are responsible for our own happiness, we will develop greater inner peace.
This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t care about what others think. If we want to achieve success in our careers, relationships and personal development, then we have to pay attention to others opinions. After all, we have to interact with others each day, so it is important that we learn to coexist peacefully and productively together. Also, when it comes to forming new friendships, acquaintances and business partners, we have to be able to trust that others will reciprocate our kindness. As long as we keep this in mind, we shouldn’t let our egos get the better of us.

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